Attract – Leila Tomasone

Attractive Vetting Strategy Part #1 of 3:

Attract Instead Of Chase

The Attraction Alignment strategy to dating starts with a powerful secret to get immediate benefits in your dating life.

With this secret, you...

Automatically screen out losers (without you even needing to know who's a loser and who's not).
Attract more high quality men.
Automatically draw out the very best in high quality men.
Find your Mr. Right faster by doing less.
And have so much more FUN dating!

You can start using this secret right now in under 1 second, and it takes no skill or experience at all.

Want me to let you in on this forgotten secret?

Here it is: Don't chase men.

It's that easy.

But it's also tricky...

...because if you're like I was, and like almost every women I mentor, you don't realize how you ARE chasing, which makes it impossible to stop.

Before I give you a little quiz to help you determine if you chase men, let me give you a teaser for what's in store for you if you recognize patterns of chasing and learn to attract instead?

This is from a mentee showing what it felt like when she first tried to stop chasing:

Quiz: Do You Chase Men?

It takes a process of realization to see your behavior in a new way and to stop an unconcious, ingrained pattern.

So for a few examples of chasing, ask yourself if you've ever done any of these?

Driving the conversation
Initiating dates
"Trying again" with men who've ghosted you
"Double texting"
Trying to impress him, entertain him, or keep him interested
Setting the "agenda" of conversation
Suppressing your true feelings, needs, or desires because of how you guess he'll respond
Giving way too much detail or gushing in response to questions
Escalating physically prematurely, or compromising your standards
Overthinking responses to questions or texts
Trying to outsmart him or making "clever" plans to move the relationship forward

My guess is that you see yourself in some of these...

But you might be thinking "Well, if I'm not supposed to do any of this, what the heck else is there to even do?"

If you're reacting this way, you're deep into a "chasing" mindset like a fish in water...

And I'm here to tell you Attractive Vetting holds SO MUCH MORE for you than you can even imagine!

Just wait!

But before we get there, you really need to get this (Sorry if it hurts!):

Problems With Chasing

Chasing Hides Your Attractiveness, and Drives Away High Quality Men

Look at the man's unconscious perspective when you chase him: "She's reaching out to me, prodding me to move, prodding me to take things to the next level. It must be because she doesn't think she's worthy enough for me to want to pursue her."

That might have hurt. I'm sorry! But that's really the signal chasing sends men.

Now you might be thinking, "How is this fair? Why can't I initiate if he's being slow?"

All I can say is sorry babe, I don't make the rules! I just teach what works to find a high quality man. so that you don't suffer from getting ghosted by unintentionally turning him off.

Chasing Makes You A Target For Losers

But look closer at what really happens when a man is being too slow for you and you decide to take charge... it might not end up how you want:

When you stop and think about it, you'll see that Mr. Right will not be found at the end of a chase.

Because chasing only gets you losers looking for a mommy to take care of them.

Let me ask you:

Is the Mr. Right that you dream of a man that would need you to chase him and convince him that you're the one he should accept for life-long love?

Are you looking for a man to say "Ok... sure, I guess"?

Do you want a man who waits for YOU to propose to HIM?

If not, why start a relationship out on that foot—with you doing all the initiating? Do you expect the chasing dynamic will magically reverse some time in the future? It won't happen.

And how would you feel months and years down the road if you did chase and convince him? Would you be afraid he’s not really in it for the long-haul, or that he might wonder whether he could’ve "done better"?

If you want an initiative-taking, decisive, and masculine man, chasing will never work to find him.

So what to do instead of chasing? Now things get fun!

How To Attract: Do "Nothing"

Huh?!?!

Here's how the conversation with many mentees goes at this point:

Mentee: Ok Leila, I see now I might be chasing men, so what do I do to attract instead?

Leila: You don’t do anything.

Mentee: What do you mean?

Leila: Just stop chasing.

Mentee: Surely there’s SOMETHING I can do instead?

Leila: Nope.

Mentee: That doesn’t make any sense. You want me to switch from chasing to attracting, right?

Leila: Not exactly.

Mentee: I’m not getting it.

Leila: Attracting is not a different thing to DO instead of chasing. Attracting is BEING. You’re already attractive to men because you ARE a woman, so if you're growing in connecting with your feminine energy you're right where you need to be. If you want to think about “doing” things, don’t think about men. It might include some inner work and healing which we'll talk about, but it mainly means doing things that make you feel MORE yourself, and more connected with your feminine energy, more embodied with yourself.

Mentee: Ok like what?

Leila: If that's more time on your hair in the mornings, do it. If it’s making art, do that. Yoga, reading, coffee with friends, old hobbies and interests to pick back up, whatever. Just enjoy yourself! If you’re doing anything to try to impress or please a man, you’ve missed it and turned back to chasing. Men will be more attracted to you the more you aren't concerned about attracting them. Just be yourself, feel what you feel, live in the moment, and enjoy your life. They'll LOVE it!

Here's What Attraction Looks Like In Dating

With Attractive Vetting, here's what dating looks like instead of chasing:

Being happy, smiling, warm, and at ease
Being busy enjoying your life whether he takes 3 minutes to text back or 3 days
Feeling at peace when a man deselects himself from a chance to win your heart (it's his loss!)
Leaning back and observing during conversations since you know he is the one auditioning for a place in your life (much more on "auditioning" in a minute)
Noticing what agenda HE is setting for conversation
Being in touch with how he's making you feel
Feeling at ease with positive and negative emotions, expressing your needs and desires honestly in the moment
Feeling playful and laughing, having fun with banter, mystery, and tingling tension between you
Expressing desires and requests (like "I'd like to be picked up") without expectation, and enjoying letting him meet them (this makes you MORE exciting to a man than trying to be "impressive" or "entertaining")
Generously expressing gratitude and excitement when receiving his attention, initiative, or gifts (this is like food to a man's soul)
Revealing your preferred sexual boundaries and standards and holding to them with total security
Feeling what's true for you, regardless of his mood
Being pleased and ready when he moves the relationship towards marriage

Sound's awesome, doesn't it?

But can you imagine a loser man putting up with this?

He wants you to do all the work, he wants you to put on a show for him (until he gets bored).

So this "attractive," leaned-back posture feels like a million-mile tall wall he has ZERO interest in climbing, and he won't be bothering you any more once he gets one whiff of it.

And here's why the "Don't Chase" Feminine secret is so powerful: at the same time it repels lazy losers, it ATTRACTS masculine, energetic men looking for a woman who knows she's worth winning.

Here's What Attractive Dating Will Do For You

Check out this text from a mentee in Denmark showing attraction in action:

Isn't that amazing!?!?

Look closely:

One loser out of the picture with lightning speed! Good riddance, she's not looking for a taxi driver!

And one high quality man shows himself and starts his chase!

Stone cold efficiency with losers AND hot romantic pursuit from a potential Mr. Right, all unlocked by a single, simple shift in strategy!

I love it!

Attracting instead of chasing says to a man, subconsciously: "There's a prize right here. Come and see if you have what it takes to win!"

Masculine men are energized by a challenging goal so your attractive posture gives quality men a laser target to focus their competitive energy and efforts toward (they love this).

They'll want to WIN... YOU!

But then what?

The men that chase you might be in a class above the losers, many might even be great and admirable men, but which one is "The One" for you?

How do you find your Mr. Right?

"Vetting" is how to find out, and it all starts with a simple and powerful strategy to shoft your dating mindset I'll share with you on the next page...